10 Reasons I Would Not Want To Be Famous

10. Chances are I got there by notoriety.

9. I would not like having 2,976,487 followers on Twitter. That's just too many.

8. Some picture of me would surface from college by someone wanting 10K and I would have to do some explaining to my mom.

7. I'd have to meet Cojo on the red carpet and his teeth scare me. They are like tombstones.

6. Kanye would interrupt me during my spot on Dave Letterman and say that I did a good job, but my former self was much better.

5. People would expect me to buy a big house and I really don't want to have to keep all that crap clean.

4. Instead of cameramen trying to photograph me without makeup, I'd be the one they would try to catch with it on.

3. Kim Kardashian would hate me and try to get me kicked out of night clubs for having rival sized butt cheeks.

2. My agent would want me to get caught with no underwear on or to be drunk in an airport slapping old women with with my iPod so I can make sure and at least still have bad press after my debut turns out to be my only but. I'm just not sure I'm into that.

1. I'd have to chip in for Obama's health care plan. But I guess if I'm a celebrity, then I can really go to the airport and slap an old lady and throw a fit and no one could do anything about it. Except Dr. Phil.